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jbelmont

California
3106 Posts

Posted - 10/31/2008 :  2:38:01 PM  Show Profile  Visit jbelmont's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Here is one I made up which is similar to Jay Leno's type of humor.

When I first arrived in portland I saw a cafe at the airport. I said, wow, great metro, lots of cafe's, even at the airport. Then, I walked 100 feet and saw ANOTHER cafe. I asked them if it was really necessary to have two cafe's in the same airport. The lady working there said that they had FIVE. I was taken aback. I said, do you really need five? She said that they all got business. When I walked around Portland later that day, I found that every two blocks, there was at least one coffee house.

Later on, I found out that the department of nutrition had done a SURVEY of local Portland residents to test their knowledge of dietary nutrition. The RESULTS showed that 3 out of 5 Portland residents thought that BISCOTTI was one of the five food groups.

With the economy going haywire, people around the country are complaining about volatile markets. Today, I read the newspaper and learned that Boston residents were complaining that Orange Juice futures had gone up 20% overnight. New York residents were complaining that stock options were no longer affordable. But, in PORTLAND people were complaining that there was no way to buy SCONE futures.

Portland residents were also concerned about global climate changes. With extreme temperature changes being so common, and rainfall becoming irratic, Portland residents were afraid this would effect the farm industry. If grass didn't grow as easily as before, that would effect how effectively people could graze cows, and if cows couldn't graze easily, that would effect the price of milk, which would then... god forbid, effect the price of CREAMER.

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